Emperor
by Jesse Cullen
Summary: Oneshot. Souji x Kanji. A different outcome to the events that took place at the school camping trip. Souji helps Kanji face his true self. Rated for language.


The very second Kanji entered their tent Souji knew that Yosuke was going to raise a fuss in some way. It bothered him a little that his closest friend was still acting so immature towards Kanji, but he suspected Yosuke was merely reacting as such because he felt threatened by Kanji, and not just on the level of physical strength and bravery. Despite the fact that Kanji-kun was two years younger than himself and Yosuke, Souji had to marvel at the boys' comfortableness with that part of him ever since they'd rescued him from inside the TV.

Yosuke, Chie and Yukiko were all still slightly ashamed that they harbored those feelings deep down, although they'd all be striving to change themselves for the better. But Kanji had done something they hadn't: he'd accepted his true self and didn't seem to really mind all that much that everyone in the investigation team had seen what they'd saw.

Kanji was still a little dim when it came to the finer aspects of the investigation and he still had that maddening tough guy air, but Souji genuinely liked the kid and for some reason felt himself feeling rather sorry for the newest member of their little investigation squad. Kanji had so many barriers that he set up against the outside world. He was terrified of rejection and judgment and yet through those barriers he managed to have those very things forced on him. In spite of his punk attitude and tough guy demeanor, Souji sensed that Kanji was quite vulnerable.

Something that Yosuke apparently did not realize.

"Are…are we gonna be safe with you in here?" Yosuke asked, practically flattened against the opposite side of the tent from where Kanji was sitting. Kanji, who was searching for the penguin cracker in the half empty pack of animal crackers Yosuke had helped himself to earlier, looked up, blinking in mild confusion.

"The hell's that supposed to mean?" Kanji asked.

"He didn't mean anything by it, Kanji-kun," Souji said, glaring warningly at Yosuke who was still looking nervous.

"Dude," Yosuke hissed insistently, "I just wanna make sure that he doesn't attack us in our sleep!"

Kanji stood up so fast that he toppled the pack of animal crackers to the floor of the tent, spilling crumbs and crackers everywhere.

"How many times do I have to tell you?" Kanji all but shouted. Souji glanced nervously at the tent's entrance, terrified that all this commotion would alert King Moron or one of the other teachers. "I'm fine around girls now!"

"Oh yeah?" Yosuke replied. "Prove it!"

"How exactly is he supposed to—" Souji began. He stopped himself, realizing that not only were Kanji and Yosuke not listening to him, but that any sort of interjection he tried to make would probably only make things worse. He shook his head, dug out his mp3 player and sat back on his sleeping bag, listening to music from an old video game he'd played. He didn't have to turn the volume up too high, which meant that Yosuke and Kanji weren't arguing all that loudly, but once or twice when he opened his eyes he saw that their argument was getting worse.

He felt the tent rustle slightly and once more opened his eyes. The front flap of the tent was swinging closed and Kanji was nowhere to be seen. Souji looked around and saw that Yosuke was still standing, breathing heavily but looking a little sheepish.

"What the hell happened?" Souji asked as he removed his headphones.

"He…he's going over to the girls' tent…" Yosuke said, sounding caught somewhere between disbelief and anxiety. "Damn it…if King Moron finds him he's gonna have Kanji's ass."

"Why'd he run out?" Souji asked, his eyes narrowing in suspicion. Yosuke did not look at him, but sat back down on his sleeping bag, rubbing the back of his neck with his hand in apparent embarrassment.

"Yosuke!" Souji hissed angrily.

"I…I might've said something…but it's not my fault if he gets expelled!" Yosuke insisted. "I mean I didn't dare him or anything!"

Souji shook his head and glanced once more at the tent's entrance. He knew what Kanji could get like when he was really pissed and if he went wandering around the girls' side of camp in the dark then there was no telling what would happen. Taking a deep breath, Souji got to his feet and marched towards the front of the tent.

Yosuke caught him by the arm. "Dude, what the hell are you doing?" He hissed.

"What does it look like?" Souji answered. "I'm going to stop Kanji-kun before he gets in trouble."

"But you could get caught too!" Yosuke said. "Besides it's not like it's your fault for—"

"No," Souji said delicately, "it really isn't my fault. It's yours." He smiled brightly at Yosuke who looked stunned. "So you should really be going out there to get him."

Yosuke stood there, gaping at Souji, his hand still clamped firmly on Souji's forearm. Then after a second he loosened his grip and fell back on his sleeping bag, still looking like someone had just clubbed him over the head.

"Just…be careful…" Yosuke said. "If you run into King Moron, yell as loud as you can and I'll come find you."

"How would that help?" Souji asked, bemused.

Yosuke shrugged. "Well…safety in numbers right? Besides we can just tell anyone who comes that you were going into the words for a piss or something and you bumped into King Moron. He's probably pretty liquored up by this point."

Souji smiled at his friend before he silently pushed the front flap of the tent open and stepped outside. The night was brisk, though not terribly cold. He was grateful he hadn't changed out of his school issued camping clothes or else he knew he'd probably be freezing. He couldn't imagine how Kanji was feeling. He hadn't been wearing his school tracksuit in the tent. Then again, if he was angry he probably didn't mind the chill so much.

It wasn't pitch black, which Souji was also thankful for. There was a full moon shining through the trees that cast the campsite into some relief, although it was hardly lit up like a department store window. He could see the other tents on the boys' side, all of them dark and silent. And if he strained his ears, he could hear some of the other students snoring. Shaking his head, Souji headed off at a brisk pace towards the opposite end of the camp where the girls' tents were.

Having seen his fair share of freaky shit in the TV world, Souji was not remotely afraid of the dark, although he still felt the slight oppression of being out here alone. Once or twice the sound of a bird of cricket in the trees made him start, although this happened so often that eventually it became too common for him to bat an eyelash at.

The real threat out here was Mr. Morooka. Souji knew the man was probably hammered by this point so it would be no trouble to run away if he saw the man coming at a distance. But he knew booze probably made King Moron's temper even worse and he didn't really want to have to holler for Yosuke and cause a scene.

The girls' side of the camp was past the picnic shelters where they'd eaten dinner…or at least where everyone else had eaten dinner while he and Yosuke had been subjected to Chie and Yukiko's idea of curry. His empty stomach churned at the very thought of the stuff, which Yosuke had insisted on throwing into the fire pit before leaving for the tents. Maybe that was why Yosuke was so irritable tonight. Starvation had a way of putting people on edge, especially someone like Yosuke who enjoyed his creature comforts.

The picnic area was deserted…or so Souji initially thought. As he made his way hurriedly towards the concrete platform he heard something that made his heart nearly stop. Somebody was sitting at the picnic table, just out of his range of vision and making a noise like a wounded animal.

At first, Souji thought it was Mr. Morooka and he'd just taken a big breath to yell out for Yosuke when he realized that the noise didn't sound like anything King Moron could ever make. It was too heartfelt. He stood there, just on the edge of the picnic area, listening as hard as he could to indentify just who it could be.

A cloud shifted from in front of the moon and for one brief moment the picnic area was lit up in silver white light. It wasn't Mr. Morooka…it was Kanji, slumped over a picnic table with his head in his arms and heaving.

He was crying.

Souji desperately wanted to move forward, to reach out to the boy and comfort him, but his legs wouldn't move. He stood, rooted to the spot and stared ahead, watching with wide eyes and with a heavy heart. Had whatever Yosuke said really gotten to Kanji that badly?

Kanji raised his head from his arms and looked up at the starry sky. Even in the weak moonlight, Souji could clearly see the tear streaks on the boy's face. Then, without so much as a warning Kanji's head turned towards the spot where Souji stood at the same time the moon went back behind its cloud. Souji felt his breath catch. Kanji may be his friend, but there was no telling how he'd react if he'd seen Souji watching this private moment.

For several moments there was silence. Even Kanji had stopped sobbing. Souji felt a great desire to turn and run back to his tent, but he couldn't bring himself to do it.

"Who's there?" Kanji called into the darkness. His voice had returned to its typical tough guy edge, but there was no denying a slight catch to it. Souji didn't reply, still worried about how Kanji would react. "I said who's there damn it!" Kanji said in a voice just below a yell.

Souji closed his eyes, took a deep breath and stepped forward, drawing towards Kanji's picnic table. Even without the moon out once he was this close he could see Kanji clearly. And Kanji could see him. The boy got to his feet abruptly.

"S-senpai?" He said, the tough exterior vanishing for a brief moment. Kanji must've realized how weak he sounded so he cleared his throat and like magic the barrier was back up. "The hell are following me out here for?"

"You ran out," Souji said, drawing level. Kanji's cheeks were still tear stained. He'd stopped crying, although Souji could tell that the boy was still incredibly upset. "I was worried. What happened?"

Kanji looked away, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. He was in his white t-shirt and Souji marveled at the fact that he wasn't shivering in the chilly night air. "It's nothing," Kanji said. "It's just…what Yosuke-senpai said back there…that's all."

Souji cocked his head to one side. "I…uh…wasn't listening to most of it."

Kanji scowled. "Yeah well whatever. It's done and I'm –"

"You're what?" Souji asked, his voice not inflecting any sort of pressure. "Over it?" He shook his head. "You can't tell me you're over it. Not if it got you riled up enough to go storming out here without a thought for what would happen if King Moron found you."

Kanji gritted his teeth and rolled his eyes. "I just needed to clear my head is all. Alright?"

Souji shook his head. "Bullshit," he said. "Yosuke pissed you off. I understand that. He's a great guy, Kanji-kun. He really is. But even I know he can be an insensitive ass once in a while."

"What's the big deal?" Kanji asked angrily. "I got pissed off and ran out, okay? Why the hell do you want to know what he said?"

"Because it must have been pretty awful to make you cry like that." Souji said levelly. For a second he couldn't quite believe what he said. Kanji stared at him in disbelief and for a very long moment Souji seriously expected the boy to give him a right hook to the jaw. He'd probably deserve it.

But it was then that all the fight seemed to go out of Kanji. He simply stared at Souji for a long time, so long that Souji began to get uncomfortable. He wondered if maybe Kanji had blacked out or something, but upon closer inspection he realized that Kanji was crying again, just standing there silently, tears streaming from his eyes again.

This time Souji simply didn't stand there stupidly and watch. He stepped forward, put his hands on Kanji's shoulders and steered him towards the picnic bench, forcing him to sit down. The bench was cold and just as uncomfortable as it had been earlier that day, but neither Souji nor Kanji took notice of it. Souji sat next to Kanji and simply let him cry on his shoulder. Almost subconsciously Souji found his fingers stroking the boy's soft hair. He didn't attempt to shush Kanji in anyway. He knew that it would be better for Kanji to just let it all out right now. Sometimes people just needed to cry. Even Yosuke. Souji smiled to himself, remembering that day not so long again at the riverbank.

But this wasn't about Yosuke. It was about Kanji-kun.

After several minutes, Kanji sniffled once or twice and sat up straight.

"I-I'm sorry senpai," he said, all the toughness gone from his voice. "I'm not usually—"

"Its fine," Souji said softly. "I know I haven't known you long Kanji-kun. But I really just wanna help. So could you please just…tell me what's wrong?"

Kanji took a deep breath and stared back up at the sky. "I just…I feel…ugh, god damn it…Yosuke's right." He sounded completely defeated now and shook his head as he went on, "They're all right. I…I'm okay around girls now, thanks to Chie-senpai and Yukiko-senpai but…it doesn't mean that I'm interested in them…" His voice shook and he looked back up at the sky, clearly trying to avoid eye contact with Souji.

Souji said nothing for a moment. He'd suspected as much from Kanji since they'd traveled through the bathhouse that he'd formed in the TV world. He really didn't have a problem with it because he knew that there was more to a person than their sexual orientation. But he also knew there were still those bigots who made a big deal out of it.

Like Yosuke, although Yosuke's unease around Kanji was more stemmed from innocent ignorance than hatred or prejudice. Yosuke just didn't understand why a guy wouldn't be interested in girls.

"It's like I said in that world," Kanji went on, now looking down at his feet. "I'm scared shitless of people rejecting me if they find out. They usually do. That's why I feel like I have to be like this, y'know? Just be as loud and threatening as possible to keep them away. I figure if they don't get to know me…they'll never reject me when they find out…"

Kanji turned and looked at Souji, his eyes pleading. He'd stopped crying but there was such an earnest expression on his face that Souji took a small intake of breath, feeling oddly moved by Kanji's expression.

"S-senpai…" Kanji said, "I get it if you…" His voice choked and he looked away. For a moment Souji was puzzled by Kanji's sudden loss of voice and by that look he'd given him. Then he understood. Kanji was scared that Souji would reject him now that he knew.

Slowly, Souji reached his hand out and covered Kanji's own with it. Kanji started and looked around at him, his eyes wide.

"Senpai…" he said breathlessly.

"Shh.." Souji whispered. "It's okay, Kanji-kun. You don't have to be afraid of me. I would never reject you for being true to yourself." Kanji's eyes widened even further. "You're great," Souji said. "I've only known you for a short time but…well, I think you're amazing."

Without a word, Souji closed the space between himself and Kanji and kissed him. Kanji tensed at first, obviously unsure of what to do. But then, as Souji deepened the kiss, Kanji wrapped his arms around him.

Inwardly, Souji really had no understanding of just why he wanted to kiss Kanji. All he knew was that it seemed the right thing to do. He hadn't ever kissed anybody before, let alone another boy. But it felt right. After several quiet, perfect moments, they broke apart, both breathing heavily.

"Senpai…" Kanji whispered.

Souji shook his head. "Souji," he corrected. "From now on, okay?"

Kanji chuckled. "Sure…Souji-kun."

Souji smiled and stood up, Kanji following. Together they walked back through the dark night towards their tent, where they found Yosuke fast asleep. Kanji slept close to Souji, his back pressed against him with Souji's arm draped over him.

Souji smiled before eventually drifting off, picturing the look on Yosuke's face if he happened to wake up before them in the morning.


End file.
